I have to learn to cope with an aging parent. Ok, my mother's been 69 last May, so one can assume she's already been aging for the last 5 years or so. That is true - but I never see her, and so I can pretend she's staying as young as in the early 60s, where my first memories of her come from.

Now she's had disc problems and has suffered surgery four times.
She doesn't wear any hearing aid, although she's deaf as can be. Imagine: you turn the TV on volume 31, normally we use 19 or so. Still, with 31, when our apartment floor vibrates, our heads explode and our brains begin to burn, she every now and then has to ask "What did she say?", and if there's no lip movement on the screen she can watch, she won't get anything. No American films, no any other than just ARD and ZDF bullshit on TV when whe's around... :sigh: If we sit and atch (and listen) to a TV program while she's doing her crossword puzzle, she tends to tell stories or ask questions out of the blue, without caring whether we feel disturbed.

She wants to help me with everything, and that is so lovely of her and really, really kind - but she's here to visit us for only one or two times per year - why should I let her stay in the apartment and do the ironing? I want her to get out with me!

And she doesn't see her grandchildren more often than only these two times. Why can't she just shut up and enjoy her healthy, cute, intelligent if not brilliant and so beautiful grandchildren without complaining about the chaos in their rooms? Stay out, Mom! Concentrate on the important things, who knows how often you'll have the opportunity!

She smokes again like a steamer. I don't dare to complain, and she's offended when we just mention that we are a non smoking household. Everything is stinking. And she doesn't even ask if we disapprove.

But nevertheless: she's my mommy. I love her, And it breaks my heart to see that her life is getting more limited every year.